To make strenuous or violent efforts in the face of difficulties or opposition
To overcome by mental or moral power
Life is work.
As we grow from children to adults, the tasks don’t get harder necessarily… our frame of reference and experiences change.
We sit now as adults and look at children and are jealous of their seemingly care- and trouble-free world.
On one hand, yes they are unaware of how world events or their environment may have an impact on their future. Their ability to comprehend the concept of cause and effect has not fully developed.
However, watching my niece quite simply have a nervous breakdown trying to figure out why the square peg does not fit into the round hole is proof enough that at any age, we can find ourselves flustered by situations and oppositions when we don’t understand them.
Our ability to handle situations mature as we do. Soon my niece will understand why the square peg needs a square hole, but she won’t understand why she now needs to share that toy with her sister.
As children, this cycle of struggle and conquering of said struggles is embraced and applauded by everyone around during the learning process. Through this guidance and assistance, the struggles are slowly conquered and new ones are found.
Why is it then that as adults we suddenly expect ourselves to skip the struggling stage and just fast forward to conquering?
Why when we reach a river of hardship directly in our path do we expect to build the boat to traverse the rough river all by ourselves?
Have we suddenly become so superior in our adulthood that we no longer need assistance or guidance with our adult struggles? Why is it seen as a weakness when some people simply do not have the necessary experiences or skills to build that boat alone?
In the work place we rely on different people to be experts in their area. In our personal life, we approach that river and expect to suddenly have the knowledge of an architect, engineer, craftsman and captain. We then consider ourselves failures when we can’t build, maintain and steer our own vessel.
Not many people can do all those things for themselves every time they find themselves with a river to cross, they quite simply are setting themselves up for failure.
Hopefully some people will realize that if we are realistic, we can always use other people’s assistance and guidance. Other people enjoy helping you to cross that river. You’d be surprised how many times that person helping you… needed to cross that same river anyhow but just needed someone to do it with.
As Kim said today: It’s like handing someone a hammer and a nail and asking them to nail Jell-O to the wall. It’s just not feasible.