Saturday was a really eventful and fun day. It started at 6:00am at Mom’s house with the ritual of finding Mom and Rob and telling them in detail about my evening. Who I danced with, what I drank, what people smelled like, my opinion on everything. I talk until Rob glazes over. Mom always listens with rapt attention, because she finds me to be humorous and my stories entertaining.
Maybe Rob doesn’t find them as cheap and entertaining because so many stories include: And then this dumb boy, and that douche bag, and then you wouldn’t believe what that twat-waffle* had to say… Or maybe he is just resting his eyes while I talk, and practicing his deep breathing… and sometimes fake snoring. I must have a REALLY soothing voice. Ha.
Then I get ready at Mom’s and proceed to rummage through her makeup and clothes to find appropriate motorcycle-riding attire. The first thing mom picks out for me is a leopard print cami. Being my first organized bike ride, I didn’t think showing up in animal print, large aqua sunglasses and pants with a hole in the crotch (pointed out to me later by a concerned citizen)… would really say “newbie”… it would say “saddle up… come and get it… if you find me on the side of the road, return me too…” those kinds of things.
I make it to Poynette in time to wake up Troy, the leader of the pack. If by leader, I’m referring to the person driving the back I’m riding on… then this is a true statement. He is upset with the lack of breakfast-bringing I did. I brush this off as a lack of communication. Then tell him not to worry, I stopped and got myself a soda and granola bar, after eating an english muffin at my mom’s house, but he could definitely get us breakfast later if he was still hungry. I can’t imagine why this plan didn’t fly.
Since the ride was only pitched to me as “a big ride tomorrow”, imagine my surprise when we show up in Sauk… yup, I rode on the back of the bike not knowing where, how long, etc I was going. It’s probably the quietest Troy has ever seen/heard me be. I’ll probably get invited on more rides for that reason alone. We registered for the ride and walked around the Sauk Harley Davidson. I’d never been in there before. Pretty big place, lots of sparkly, skull, bedazzled fun stuff lying around. I like it all.
We rode with other Poynette friends of Troy’s, Di & Gary and Dane (aka Hey You) and his wife (whose name escapes me at this moment… bad Greta). We rode from Sauk to Loganville. On the way we stopped to help a biker that had dumped his bike and rider on one of the back country roads about 5 miles outside of Loganville. They were both alright in the end. The girl had a wound that was gushing (maybe a slight exaggeration, but just slight) blood. Being the cool, collected person I am… I go: “Troy, Troy, Troy, TROY…” when he finally looks I make the Mr Yuck face and point down at her ankle. And say “Fix it”. Yup, I’m clutch in emergency situations. I proceed to hold her head and chat with her and learn her life story while the boys fly in with their capes, rubber gloves and first aid kits to bandage her up.
We all make it to loganville and have some hotdogs and refreshments. We find clean bathrooms (Troy found them, 2 points) and were excited. I managed to make it all the way back to Sauk without peeing on the bike. 2 points for me. We checked out the post-ride party at the park.
Mike and Lube were setting up to play. Unfortunately we were all pretty exhausted at that point and decided after walking around barefoot, making up fake relationships and names for each other, and offering to marry a couple (Di would be the maid of honor, I would be the flower girl) we decide to head back to Poynette.
We stop at a local bar and have a couple of beers and then head back to base camp and get ready to go find a place to watch the fireworks. We go to an undisclosed location and proceed to watch the fireworks and eat subway. The whole day was pretty much great. I haven’t slept that hard in a while. Dead to the world, for sure. No snore, gunshot or firecracker was going to wake me up from that sleep.
The MDA ride was such an amazing experience. I consider myself lucky to have gotten to experience it. So many great people, out for a great cause, on a beautiful day. Well organized and ran. If I had done anything differently, I would have worn sunscreen and brought flip flops for the stops. Feet were warm, and shoulders ended up burnt. Small price to pay.
*NOTE: Twat-waffle is not in the dictionary and was caught by spell check. I think it’s a solid adjective and should be added. I’m going to write a letter to someone about it.