You know what almost annoys me more than the person that gossips non stop about things they know nothing about with absolutely no frame of reference, so they might as well be speaking Ewok to everyone?

The person who tells you that someone is speaking in Ewok about you.

They feel the need to really get into it and be all incognito about the facts.

“Well, there is this person.
Who said some things.
Just things.
Not that.
Not that.
Not that… wait you did what?
Anyways, I can’t tell you how I know, but I know they told someone else something and that person told another person something…
Watch your back.”

What the fuck is that.

If you can’t recite to me my social security number, date of birth, last sexual encounter, or criminal record… then you didn’t get any good gossip.  I don’t give a shit if they are telling someone what I ate for lunch or that I was talking about farting and blaming someone else.

Don’t bother trying to warn me to not say something (but not tell me what) to a person (but not tell me who).  Oh, I see.  I should just assume that everyone is talking about me and that I should talk in code when having conversations at work.  I could make up gestures for things… but that could just be misconstrued as air humping from across the cubicles (which is most likely what I AM actually talking about).

That’s all.

Please, if you are going to rat out the gossiper.  Grab up your balls and at least lay it all out there.  Make it good.  Otherwise, no one cares.



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