My friends and I have had many recent conversations regarding expectation management. It seems that many of our frustrations with people involve not only their actions but also our expectations of them and how they manage to reach them… or not so much. On one hand we know that there are in fact times when maybe we need to adjust our expectations. This is especially true when it comes to the men in our lives. You know the saying that talks about how men aren’t mind readers (or as it turns out lip readers, sound hearers, or gesture comprehenders)… well although we know that… we still expect them to know certain things. The fine line is when we realize that maybe they don’t know something, however we feel like it is so obvious that it is similar to a neon elephant in the room.
This is true in all areas of our lives, not just the loves of our lives. There are many times that our disappointment, anger or agitation comes as a direct result of the outcomes of a situation not living up to our pre-conceived expectations. There are times I murmur to myself “expectation management”… picture someone meditating while saying this… not a little cave-dwelling creature (ahem… Gollum) muttering “my precious”… that’s different and weird.
Even with this realization, it is still hard to practice expectation management… I find I also have to not be stubborn. This is apparently the true crux of the situation. In order to address my expectations, I have to also change the way I think and feel about some things which may indirectly point to the fact that I was less than right about something. That is not a fun realization to come to or something to be shouting from the rooftops.
Although it has become a mantra I say to myself… I still find it harder to put into practice. “Easier said than done…” you know?
Here’s to realistic expectations… or at least inching closer to better expectation management.